weeee today im happy cos.. cos.. cos i passeddd my FTT! woohoos hahas :D i was actually quite scared luh cos i only did my e-trial test today.. like an hour before the actual test.. and i was so tired from staying up watching soccer that i totally anyhow do the e-trial tests.. and i failed 2 of them wahahas! then the session ended left like 15 min to the test then i damn scared lols.. lucky pass sia! i really dun wanna re-take lor :D
went straight to workplace after that.. today is seriously staff shortage.. but lucky not busy la hehs.. work 12-7 but time seems to pass sooo sooo slowly! like nothing to do i also very tired sia. haha i think i prefer being busy ^^ only got bangla keep di-siaoing sy and me so we 3 just keep tok cok hehe :)
tmr a friend of mine going court.. really hope everything goes fine for him! jiayou weakzai!!:)
wth la i can't believe i fell asleep for so long that i fail to wake up to my alarm lols.. when i woke up the brazil vs chile match alr at the 89th min liao kns!!! hahahaa nvr see the goals but nvm brazil won so i still win heeheeee(:
it's 5.20am now.. later 11am got work lols everyday this kind of timing wakeup my body clock really damn screwed sia lols

junling is a happy girl today, cos she doesn't need to go work! :)))
haha captain called me in the morning today, but i already have plans for today weeee~
woke up quite early considering i stayed up so late the previous night to watch soccer hahas.. met marvin for lunch @ cp.. ajisen! wahahas. he's changed quite abit lol i can't believe he's even slimmer than his bro already! =.= waited for him for like half an hour? i was like a hungry ghost by the time he reached lols.. ton-toro ramen yumyummm.
oh andanddd. i finally got new headphones!! still the onto brand heh but it's the lim ed pink this time.. previous one was light pink ^^
went home after that to nua awhile till evening.. then went for dinner @ sakura charcoal grilled and shabu-shabu at punggol end.. today whole day eat jap food sia o.O but the food was not bad laa.. dessert was like about the same as kbox buffet lols...
hah so many friends complaining on fb about school reopening tmr.. heehee lucky i not schooling anymore.. for now (: so shuang everyday relac sia xD
i dono what to buy for spain vs portugal.. should i buy draw??? hmmmmm.


sometimes when i see you i really want to make convo.. but i dunno what to say.. sighs. sometimes i really dono what you thinking.. cai bu tou.. i wish we could still be like how we were in the past.. everytime di siao each other.. joke and laugh.. but i guess it's impossible right? i miss you still. alot. hais. i need more time for my wounds to heal..
will you ever see this? even if you see it, will you know that i'm talking about YOU??

你送的礼物会不会太特别？

i'm still alive! hehs. after work went for k-buffet with colleagues and captain.. haha it was quite fun.. really very destress.. we opened a bottle of martell also haha the crazy group was like screaming their lungs out when playing 5-10 and cheat.. lolz =.= very high but i didn't really eat alot lol no appetite =/
was happy over a random incident heh (: thanks for all my friends who are there for me these few days when i'm really down.. after some reflection, i have decided to set my priorities right and i believed i've emerged stronger =) hees.
left workplace at 11.30, just in time for last train hahas. reach home le so shag but still must chiong mugging for my FTT which is some elearning crap haha. next few days will be busy working and i dont think i will have the strength to mug after work so no choice gotta chiong tonight.. it's 430am and i just finished all 17 chapters kns.. e trial test is tmr 9 in the morning.. think i might just pon and book another slot on sun or smth heehee ^^
i like this busy-ness in my life.. keeps my mind occupied and busy so that i don't have time to thing about other stuff :)
lucky tmr working 2-7 hohoho if not i think i'll just die from shag-ness!
will blog again another time! need to catch up on lost sleep!

sometimes i just wish i can learn to let go of everything and just don't care. but i realise that i can't. sometimes i wish i didn't meet you and i never knew you so my emotions wouldn't be so affected by your actions. but i can't. sighhh. hate to be so emo but i can't help it.
i just need time to forget you and make you disappear from my life, completely.

work is so tiring nowadays. just now i finally brought my ipod for service at wheelock center.. the guy so funny sia, suddenly talk in english suddenly talk in chinese lols. in the end my ipod is kept for 3 days for service ahaha hope i can get a one to one replacement whee~ (:

你用唇语说你要离开 那难过无声慢了下来 汹涌潮水 你听明白 不是浪而是泪海

wish i could keep you much longer, now you gotta go cos you've got things to do.

today never go work, i cancelled my schedule and decided to go make a visit to the doc early in the morning hahas.. damn long never go see doc le usually i try to cure myself when i'm sick by taking random medicine.. lols.. but yeah i guess this time really quite serious my throat and plus i drag for very long alr lol.. walao turned out that my injury from the flood became infected.. no wonder my finger swell until so red sia omgosh =.= den he gave me some antibiotic cream to apply on my finger.. it looks better now haha.
hehehe i kinda like my work timing tomorrow.. 11-5 and i got the freedom to do my own stuff after work lols.. really need to make a trip down to wheelock to service my freaking ipod.. zzzzz gahh i'm damn lazy! lols. and i just realised that my FTT is like next monday omgosh so lazy to study please. i hope i don't fail it =X

sigh, should i just stop expecting something from you? please at least tell me or drop me a hint, if not i think i will just let you go. there's really no point holding on if i cannot figure out what you are thinking...

sian.. these few days being feeling kind of :/
very uncertain about my future and some other stuff.. some ppl say i change alot this year.. sometimes when i think about it i wonder if it's really my work or rather the nature of my work that caused it.. idk after all it's an entertainment spot.... sighs.. this is why i don't like to be alone.. when i'm alone i think too much and make myself more and more emo only... that's why i like to keep myself as busy as possible.. i once told someone if only my life is just everyday wake up, go work, then come back too tired to do anything just straight away go sleep jiu hao le.. today one of my friend told me i'm a workaholic and i work so much that i have very little chance to meet up with my other friends.. i felt quite bad sia cos my life is only about work that i don't have time for anything else :(
i dunno la sometimes i wish i can just stay young forever and not grow up.. life is too complicated for me. sigh why can't everyone just be very good friends and there's no such thing as bgr.. i don't want to speculate but i hate it when you keep mentioning xxx but yet i can't tell you how i really feel cos i'm scared of the answer you'll give me and i think i don't even understand you. i don't think i've got the energy to keep on trying.. sometimes i listen to songs that remind me of you i have to deliberately skip them.. idk and i don't want history to repeat itself so i keep telling myself i have to be extra careful and i don't want to be hurt a second time... but sometimes i guess i just cannot help it :( it is really very hard to forget someone who gave you alot of good memories.. i hao bu rong yi slowly recover from the pain and i don't think i wanna be hurt a second time
my body is like getting weaker and weaker everyday idk why.. maybe cos of irregular meals and everything.. injured two of my fingers ytd while i was caught in the flood :( it still hurts very badly up till now sigh.. and seem to keep coughing easily these few days sian.. shouldn't have smoked so much in genting.. quite regret.. sometimes i know some of the things that i'm doing are stupid and harmful to myself but yet i still do it i dunno why.. maybe cos it helps to numb the pain i'm feeling.. my parents will never know when i just say got fan nao they will not believe.. feel like got nobody to turn to except my bro sometimes but then again, i can't tell him everything i'm feeling... i hate it when people have double expectations of me.. i'm also a human what.. so what even if i'm entering uni.. i must be some guai guai nerd and have no life ah? fuck you sia _|_

i don't like it when someone can control my emotions too much. just when my heart's beginning to harden itself, don't attempt to break the shield surrounding it...


haha anyway i so won't forget how i made it to work today.. whole orchard is like some muddy river disgusting much. and my entire jeans were like SOAKED.. plus that stupid weakzai made me go all the way back to fetch him with an umbrella zzz! idiottt haha. it was totally impossible to walk across the road lols that idiot suggested taking taxi but i figured it would be impossible to alight also since the water level was at the mid-tyre level? LOLS. in the end smart me suggested training to orchard and walk the sheltered pathway from wisma to taka to cine instead haha! bloody long route but in the end never got stuck in the flood (: but still i was already wet cos before that i ghey kiang, tried to force my way across the carpark ><
worse thing was i didn't have any spare bottom so i had to stick with wearing it from 11-7 omyGAWD. >< was late for work, totally had no mood zzz..
in the midst of world cup fever.. i can't believe spain lost to switzerland zzzz! now i owe my bro a mc spicy!